Wednesday, September 10, 2008

NFL-Week Two Picks Straight Up and Against the Spread

Chicago @ Carolina (-3)
The Call: Chicago
I'll take the Bears. It's too early to jump on the bandwagon that they're back, but if they take this one as easily as last week, the Cubs will have to step it up to remain the most popular team in town come October.

Tennessee @ Cincinnati (-1)
The Call: Tennessee
Tennessee...Tennessee...Tennessee...mark my words, this team is better with Kerry Collins under center than with Vince Young, and Albert Haynesworth will terrorize Carson all day. Man are the Bengals bad.

Green Bay (-3) @ Detroit
The Call: Green Bay
The only time the Lions beat the Packers is on Turkey Day. I see no turduckens in the the near future. Therefore, Packers by at least 10 over the Liedowns.

Buffalo @ Jacksonville (-6)
The Call: (ATS) Buffalo (Straight Up) Jacksonville
Should I jump on the Dick Jauron bandwagon against a tough team like the Jaguars?? I'm in last place already. I can only go up from here, right?? Besides, the Jags let me down last week, so screw them.

Oakland @ Kansas City (-4)
The Call: Kansas City
This is based on the fact that Kansas City seemed like they played a game in Week One and Oakland seemed like they were kind of hoping they could play bad enough that Al Davis would die and they could start over.

Indianapolis (-1.5) @ Minnesota
The Call: Minnesota
Give it to the Vikes. You'd think Peyton wouldn't let his team start 0-2, and Aaron Rodgers did have success against the Vikes secondary, but if Matt Forte can run all over the Colts on the road, I predict a big day for #28 of Minnesota. Also, that Minnesota D-Line has to be a little pissed off that they put Rodgers on the ground less than 5 times with no sacks. Must really be gnawing at them.

New York Giants (-9.5) @ St. Louis
The Call: New York Giants
The GGGGGGGG-Men. I CAN'T believe I gave St. Louis a chance last week. They're hopeless, and I may never pick them again.

New Orleans @ Washington (PK)
The Call: New Orleans
Tough Call. The Saints lost Marques Colston, but the Redskins looked totally inept last week, and I'm not sure I want to risk being the only one to pick Washington for the second week in a row.

San Francisco @ Seattle (-8)
The Call: Seattle
Seriously...San Francisco is hardcore terrible. And, Seattle might want to try to make a statement this week because last week they embarassed themselves, and you know what?? They embarassed me too. I wouldn't pick them, but they're playing San Francisco. I'm not intentionally trying to lose.

Atlanta @ Tampa Bay (-8)
The Call: Atlanta
What you ask?? You're going with the Ragin' Ryans over the some alliteration word followed by Chuckies?? Yes. That's what I'm doing. Not only will Atlanta cover, they'll win!!

Miami @ Arizona (-7)
The Call: (ATS) Miami (Straight Up) Arizona
How does Arizona get 7 points on Miami?? They're both bad. Anyway, I've been making a point this week to not pick teams that screwed me last week (Miami), but the Cardinals are not my team and they never will be, so screw them. Man am I bitter this week. PS-Barnes will pick Arizona because he's a hater.

San Diego (-2) @ Denver
The Call: San Diego
LT will run for 700 yards, birth a baby, and save Darfur. Then, the Democratic National Convention will come back to Infesco Field and proclaim LT as their nominee for the presidency.

Baltimore @ Houston (-4.5)
The Call: (ATS) Baltimore (Straight Up) Houston
Am I picking the Fighting Flaccos for the second week in a row?? Yes. Why you may ask?? The Texans screwed me last week, so they're getting it from me this week.

New England @ New York Jets (-2)
The Call: New York Jets
J-E-T-S...Bretts, Bretts, Bretts!! Wait...no...that's right. The Magic Man was at it again last week, and before the season even started I said they'd win this game, so why would I back down now. Now, if only he would grow a Merlin beard and start wearing a velvet robe...

Pittsburgh (-6) @ Cleveland
The Call: Pittsburgh
We saw the games last week. I won't go any farther for all of my Browns faithful.

Philadelphia @ Dallas (-7)
The Call: Philadelphia
Doesn't this seem a little high?? Clear choice for me to take Philly. Romo, to me, will always be Tony *name that rhymes with Romo but is actually a stab at his sexual orientation*. Carrie Underwood > Jessica Simpson

1 comment:

Luke said...

two birds, one stone ... well done